More kids these days are anxious and depressed, and many have no guidance for their mental wellness other than observing others (who may have no guidance, either).
Stress makes a mess of kids and their families. Watch for symptoms such as acting out inappropriately, irritability, unmanaged feelings, intensified arguing or unusual clinginess.
Here’s the good news. Tools from God and his created world equip Christian parents to be more proactive, teaching our children about mental health.
If we don’t teach them, others will, and it will likely be a bad example of bad behavior, creating an unhelpful and unhealthy path into adulthood. The time to teach your child about mental health is now. Here are 10 parenting tools to help.
- God cares about your child’s mental health. “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you” (1 Peter 5:7). Tell your child that God cares about their thoughts, feelings and struggles.
- Encourage open conversations. Create a safe place for your child to share openly, to process what they’re feeling and describe it without fear of being shamed or punished. Remind them that emotions are not bad, and are God’s way of teaching us.
- Ask “3 questions deep.” Remember that term and tell yourself to “ask 3 questions deep” when talking with your child. “How was your day?” Fine, they’ll say, to keep things shallow. Don’t fall for it. “What was something good that happened today?” They’ll tell you something. Then dive in a bit more, “Why do you think … Who could you … When will … etc.” You’ll be amazed at the conversation that develops (especially if you put down your phone).
- Model healthy coping skills. Most parents are scared to reveal their own mental struggles with their kids, and do you know why? Because most parents aren’t coping well themselves. You can change that. Develop healthy coping skills, then let your child in, as much as possible and appropriate for their age—both into the struggle, but much more into your coping skill.
- Stress the importance of God-given identity. No, your child cannot be anyone they want to be. That’s settling for too little, because the human imagination is flawed and limited. They can be God’s best version of them! That starts with being a baptized child of God who lives with a “born again” (John 3:3). Identity isn’t chosen, it is given.
- Address anxiety and fear with God’s promises. You’ll sometimes be tempted to provide explanations, or persuade your child logically, or bribe them with rewards if they stop being anxious or afraid. They will respond much better to the promises of God than anything related to their performance or even your best logic.
- Set boundaries for technology and social media. Studies show that preschool and elementary students are not equipped for the powerful, gravitational pull of technology and social media—designed for profit, and most always not for health and wellness. Learn more about the dangers. Be intentional about when and what is appropriate and enforce the rules.
The final, and perhaps most helpful, tools for parenting about mental health are being offered right now at CrossLife Church on Sunday mornings from 9:30-10:45am. I am teaching what the Bible says about mental health.
Join me and other CrossLife families on Sundays to 8) grow in hope, and 9) get help and you will 10) discover greater health when it comes to feelings, emotions, thoughts, struggles, disorders and streatments related to mental health.
Watch the series trailer, then take your next step and attend this Sunday: https://youtu.be/wcL7pW-DQhw?si=hY6fvxiVyL9KLVMZ
PRAYER: God, remind me and make me better understand how much mental health really matters. Help me to support with compassion those who are struggling. Give me hope and real tools for my own mental health. And take care of all kids who need someone to teach them mental wellness. Amen.
TAKE THE NEXT STEP: Watch the series trailer for “Help and Hope for Our Mental Health”, then take your next step and attend CrossLife Church this Sunday: https://youtu.be/wcL7pW-DQhw?si=hY6fvxiVyL9KLVMZ
