How many times should a teacher send a student to the principal’s office before that student is expelled from school? How many times should a Netflix movie spew vulgar language before you turn it off? How many times do you clean up a neighbor dog’s poop in your lawn before you say something to them?
Those are reasonable questions with reasonable answers. How about this question: How many times should you forgive someone who sins against you? That’s also a reasonable question, but I’m warning you, the answer is unreasonable. It doesn’t make sense to us, because it’s so divine.
“Lord, how many times should I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” Jesus’ disciple Peter asks the question and Jesus answers with a parable that explains Jesus’ math: “Not seven times, but seventy times seven” ((Matthew 18:21,22).
Peter wants to limit forgiveness if a person angers too many teammates, breaks too many rules, charges too many credit cards, disrespects too many superiors, excuses from too many volunteer opportunities at church, or fakes it with too many lies.
Have you been there? Maybe you’re there now. Unforgiveness. One day you’re ready, the next day you’re not. You can’t hold back wanting the other person to hurt, because they hurt you. You keep a mental list of the things that person did to you, and you can recall that list on demand just to show how bad of a person they are. You’re waiting for some kind of repayment or changed behavior and just don’t see it.
Friend, you can’t say you love Jesus and at the same time keep a record of wrongs that another person has done. The Bible says that love “keeps no record of wrongs” (1 Corinthians 13:5). “But Jesus, forgiving isn’t easy,” we plead.
“Tell me about it,” he says.
Jesus stepped out of a perfect, harmonious, beautiful heavenly life in the eternal bliss of heaven, and stepped into an ugly, violent world of unforgiveness. He was born here, lived here, suffered here, put himself on our side and learned what unforgiveness is like—by becoming its victim. Read Jesus’ parable of the unmerciful servant in Matthew 18:21-35. Jesus accepted the servant’s sentence of prison in his place, and yours too. Jesus paid the price, as your substitute, and the debt has been paid.
Jesus forgives your unforgiveness. Jesus became your sin for you. He chained himself in your prison of unforgiveness and suffered your torture of justice: death under God’s judgment. It is done. Risen from the dead he raises you, too. You are more than forgiven, you have the spiritual power to live a new, victorious life that will fight and win the battle of forgiveness.
Remember, forgiveness is a free gift from God’s grace and mercy. For you. And for everyone else, too. That’s why forgiveness contains the word “give.”
PRAYER: Dear God, I can be so unmerciful in my thoughts toward others. Yet you are filled with mercy in your thoughts toward me. Fill me with your mercy and forgiveness, flowing over for others who have sinned against me. Amen.
SPIRITUAL NEXT STEP: On a scale of 1 (terrible) to 10 (terrific) how good are you at forgiveness? Explain. Watch this video teaching about the parable of the unmerciful servant https://crosslifepf.org/messages/how-often-to-forgive/
